Be warned – big rant coming up…

The last 4 or 5 weeks have been utterly crap, and that’s putting it politely.  First, K got a horrible tummy bug that lasted 7 days.  Yes, 7! On the worst day I had to change her nappy 13 times!  I have never seen her so ill before, she just wanted to lay on the sofa or sleep in my bed all day.  She was so miserable, sometimes she was so uncomfortable that she just couldn’t settle anywhere, so she’d ask to go to bed, then lie down for 5 minutes, then ask to go downstairs again, and so on.  This would carry on for about half an hour and then she would have an explosive nappy.  I took her to the doctor but he said they don’t do anything for diarhhoea any more these days.  He didn’t even give me any rehydration drinks for her!  Luckily I was able to keep her hydrated with lots of sips of drink and she was still able to eat a little bit of food, plus a bit more mummy milk than usual.

Then just as K started to get better, I got ill.  Luckily I only had it very mildly and just had a stomach ache for a couple of days, and even more luckily it was at the weekend so my husband was around to help out.  Unfortunately that meant he was next, he spent 5 days lying on the sofa and having vomiting and diarhhoea.  That meant I had to do literally everything as he was too ill.  Single parents I salute you because it was incredibly hard having no help at all for those few days, especially since K had suddenly developed a bad case of separation anxiety and wouldn’t let me out of her sight for more than a minute, and started refusing to go to sleep at naptime and bedtime.

We had a brief respite for about a week – it felt like things got a bit better, although K got 2 new teeth and was up in the night a few times.  Yes, that was the best week out of the past month, as we were able to go out and do things during the day!

Then over the bank holiday weekend, K had a fever (just under 40 degrees) and was really miserable again, and refused to eat anything.  We took her to the out of hours doctor (because really, how dare people get ill outside of office hours).  K was dribbling a lot and pulling at her ears so we were expecting him to say she had an ear infection or else was just teething, but as you may have guessed from the title of this post she actually had tonsillitis!  He prescribed some antibiotics and told us to alternate calpol and ibuprofen as needed.

Thankfully the antibiotics seemed to kick in pretty quickly, and K started to feel better.  However this was not the end of our troubles as she then decided that 5am was a good time to start the day, every day!  At the same time she was refusing to go to sleep until at least 8pm, which meant that she was only sleeping up to about 9 hours at night instead of her usual 11ish hours.  This made her so overtired during the day that she started having tantrums over the slightest thing.  Of course the early starts meant I was tired as well and I have to admit my patience was starting to wear thin after 5 weeks of basically being at home most of the time, going to bed early, and not being able to do anything fun.  I was not a shining example of parenting that week.  There was a lot of CBeebies and a bit of shouting involved.

We eventually figured out that the early waking was being caused by the birds outside singing the dawn chorus.  There is an air brick in her room, a relic from the old heating system that was originally in our house, so it was really, really loud as we live near some woods.  We have temporarily plugged up the holes with kitchen paper, which seems to have helped, and although she still wakes up at 5am she usually just moans and grumbles for a few minutes and goes back to sleep until 6.30, if we’re lucky.  I never would have believed that 6.30am could feel like a lie in!

Anyway there is no real point to this blog post, there is no moral to the story, it’s just a great big moan to get everything off my chest!  It has been an incredibly stressful month, and I’ve also been busier than ever with my nappy guru-ing so I have had almost no time to myself.  I am really hoping that we can be illness free and just get back to normal for a while now!

Although discovering that you’re pregnant doesn’t have to be the cue to rush out and splurge on a whole new wardrobe, it does help to invest in a few basic essentials. Good ladies lingerie specially designed for pregnancy can offer the support and comfort that standard underwear lacks. Here’s how to make sure you make the right choices.

Bras: Perhaps the most important piece of ladies lingerie you’ll invest in during your pregnancy is a good bra. It’s highly likely that your breasts will grow as the months advance, making it not only uncomfortable but also highly inadvisable to rely on the support of your current underwear drawer. You essentially have two options: a standard bra that fits your new size, or a bra specifically designed for maternity wear. The former might seem sexier, but the latter offers benefits that shouldn’t be overlooked, including extra support panels, different back fastenings and wider shoulder straps. You’ll find maternity bras in a range of high street stores – Next has some great ladies lingerie for pregnant women that won’t cost the earth. Remember, too, that you’ll also need to invest in a nursing bra if you’re hoping to breast feed. These offer drop or zip cups to make it easier to breastfeed in public.

White Pollyanna Nursing Bra from Next, £29

Pants: Your shape during pregnancy is constantly changing – from the moment that your bump begins to emerge to the day that you lose those last few pounds of baby weight. For most standard pants, this yo-yoing will simply be too much. Consider investing in a few pairs of pants that prioritise comfort over style – maternity knickers will stretch with your bump, while hipster pants can also be a good choice as they tend to sit comfortably under it.

Accessories: It isn’t just pants and bras you need to think about when planning your pregnancy. There’s a whole cost of underwear available to pregnant women, including maternity negligees, camisoles and night-dresses. Perhaps the most crucial accessory, however, is a pair of maternity tights, which won’t curl off your belly like normal tights will do. Some women also like to support their back and improve the fit of their clothes with a pregnancy girdle or maternity support  belt.

This month I have a fantastic giveaway from Groupon, to win £30 of vouchers to spend on their site.  Groupon features a daily deal on the best stuff to do, eat, see, and buy in over 140 cities across the world.  If you sign up to the site you will receive a daily email on the deals that are available in your area.  They have lots of offers for young families, from from fun activities for kids to relaxing spa-treatments for busy mums.

How to enter:

Leave a comment below saying what you would spend the vouchers on if you win.  Check out the Missed Deals page for London for inspiration!

The small print:  This competition is open to UK residents only. Closing date June 3rd 2012. The winner will be chosen using a random number generator. If I do not hear back from the winner within 1 week of first contact I reserve the right to choose another winner.

You don’t have to tweet or share this post, but if you do it helps me get more giveaways for you in future!

My daughter is 18 months old.

I am still breastfeeding her.

Despite the current recommendations to breastfeed up until at least age two, I appear to be in a minority of mums who continue to breastfeed past the age of one.

I can’t say I love breastfeeding, in fact I never really have enjoyed it. I don’t know if it stems from the difficulties we had in the early days (due to K having a tongue tie) but to me it’s just something you do like brushing your teeth or changing a nappy. I’d be quite happy to stop, but I’d prefer to wait until K starts to lose interest herself. Having said that, I’m not prepared to wait forever!

We usually only do it twice a day now, first thing in the morning and last thing at night. But in recent weeks we have been quite unlucky as K has had a tummy bug with severe diarhhoea that lasted 7 days, and a bout of tonsillitis. While she was ill she either couldn’t keep solid food down or refused to eat. She also started refusing to drink cows milk. So it was a relief that I was still able to breastfeed her and make sure she got some nourishment inside her. In fact I don’t know what we would have done without it!

I do wonder if other people think I am a weirdo or a bit of a hippy. My husband has said he thinks it’s a bit weird now. But I think I should get the final say as it’s my body after all. And for the time being I’m happy to carry on as we are.

This week’s guest post comes to you from Sarah, who has some great tips on how to help your children to learn from their mistakes.  As a parent it’s important to avoid the temptation to ‘fix’ everything and allow your children to make mistakes and feel frustration sometimes.

Mistakes are often the part of life that makes you stronger.  This is true for your kids, too.  Many times, it is our mistakes that help us learn right from wrong.  Below are 14 ways to teach your children to learn from mistakes.  Look at each and every mistake as an opportunity to learn a lesson.

• First, realize that mistakes are okay.  Mistakes aren’t always a bad thing. It isn’t possible to live life without them.  In an effort to teach your child to learn from mistakes, let it be okay for them to make them. While you do want to help them work through their mistakes, hindering your children from making a mistake can have a negative impact on their life as an adult.
• Allow them to make mistakes by making their own decisions. Do you allow your child to make any decisions?  Allowing your child the opportunity to make decisions will not only develop decision making skills, it will also give them the opportunity to learn from failure.
• Give them opportunities for responsibility.  As your children become older, you want to ensure that you give them more responsibility. Yes, they will likely make mistakes with these responsibilities. Look at this as an opportunity to learn.
• Don’t be over controlling. Don’t try to control your kids too much! Remember, the key is to let them make mistakes and make them aware of the mistakes.
• Talk about mistakes. When mistakes do happen, it is important to put them out in the open.  Make every mistake a learning venture.
• Keep in mind that children will be children. Don’t expect too much from your children.  Expect them to make mistakes.  You don’t want your children to feel like they have to be perfect.
• Be supportive even when your child makes a mistake. A mistake can quickly damage your child’s self esteem.  Let them know that a mistake does not make you love them any less.  Be a support system for your child by helping them learn from mistakes.
• Look at mistakes as an opportunity to learn. Something good can come out of each and every mistake. Instead of focusing and dwelling on mistakes, make the most out of each and every one of them.
• Teach children to admit when they are wrong. You want your children to own up to their actions, right?  With each and every mistake, should come admittance of what the problem is and how he can correct it.
• Don’t belittle your children when they make mistakes. Once a mistake happens, deal with it and put it behind you. Belittling your children constantly will only make matters worse. They will be afraid to make mistakes and be less likely to learn from them.
• If you don’t overreact, they won’t. Don’t overreact when your child makes a mistake. Set an example in your actions.
• Don’t compare your child to another child. Comparison can quickly ruin your child’s self worth.  Avoid comparing one child’s mistakes with another child in your family.
• Look for the successes in every failure. Try to bring the good to light in each and every mistake.  Star a conversation off by saying, “I’m glad that you chose to  ­­­­________ , but this is where you went wrong.”  Try to put a positive spin on everything.
• Let them know that it’s okay to make a mistake. Are you children okay with making mistakes? Do they realize that they will make numerous mistakes throughout their lifetime? You don’t want your children feeling like they are walking on eggshells around you.  Quiz them on how they feel you react when they make a mistake. This can help you see it from their point of view and help you better deal with the problem.

Use the 14 tips listed above to help teach your child to learn from mistakes. Look at mistakes as an opportunity for growing.

Sarah is a content developer working for Matryoshka Nesting Dolls an online shop for authentic Russian babushka dolls.

Remembering to de-flea cats and dogs is not one of the most exciting things in the world, but it has to be done!  I’ve been sent some Bob Martin FleaClear to review for my 2 cats.  It’s a new flea spot on treatment that contains the same active ingredient as Frontline but is much cheaper, and is available from the supermarket and pet shops.  It lasts for up to 5 weeks for cats and 8 weeks for dogs.  Using it is the same as any other spot on treatment, for a cat your put it on between their shoulder blades and at the base of the neck, job done.

I would use it again because I’m lazy and can’t be bothered to make a special trip to the vets every month.  If it does the same job and is cheaper and I can get it with my weekly shop, I’m in!

These two used to be my ‘furry babies’ but now, not so much.  Sorry boys!  The top one is Fred and the bottom one is Barney.  We got Fred first but he was lonely while we were at work, so we got Barney to keep him company!

The Experience Days giveaway is now closed. Congratulations to the winner, Hilda Hazel Wright!

I believe some babies and toddlers are quite happy to sit in their playpen/bouncy chair/on the floor and play while their parents get on with cooking, or some other useful task.  My daughter is not one of these children.  She was quite a high needs baby and although she did get better for a while, she is now going through a separation anxiety phase which means that when I am cooking, she tends to cling to my legs the whole time wanting to be picked up.  It’s either that or resort to using the TV as a babysitter, which I don’t like doing too often as I am trying to keep TV to a minimum for K.  But I do my best to cook all our meals from scratch, and so over the past 18 months I have developed some strategies to make cooking less stressful.

Plan meals

It’s much easier to cook a meal if you know you’ve got all the ingredients in stock.  I tend to plan meals about once a week, and plan 6 days worth of meals, as we usually end up eating out or having takeaway at least once a week.  This also means you can avoid the 5pm ‘what’s for dinner’ panic, which is ten times worse when you have a hungry toddler demanding to be fed as well!

Prep ahead

Do as much preparation in advance as you can.  If your little one is happily occupied with something for a few minutes, take advantage and chop a few veggies.  Since K started weaning I have found snack time to be a good time to do this, as she can sit at the table and watch, and eating keeps her occupied.  Or do it while they are napping, or even the night before, after they have gone to bed.

Quick recipes

Find quick, simple recipes that only take a few minutes to prepare and cook, with a small number of ingredients.  For example Sausage and Tomato Pasta, Quick Salmon Tikka or a simple stir fry.

Slow cooker

I personally think the slow cooker is a busy mum’s best friend!  You can put the dinner on in the morning and it simmers away all day needing just the occasional stir, and then by the time everyone’s hungry, it’s ready!  I love making stews, casseroles and chillis in mine.

Adapt recipes

I’ve become a big fan of oven baked risotto lately.  It’s something that K will eat with gusto and it’s adult friendly food too, but making it properly is a bit of a faff with all the constant stirring.  Basically you start in the same way by softening the onions in a pan and then adding the rice, but then you add all the liquid in one go, pop a lid on and pop it in the oven for about 20 minutes, stirring thoroughly halfway through.  My Daddy Cooks also has a brilliant oven baked Singapore Noodles recipe which is one of our family favourites at the moment.

Batch cook

Cook more than you actually need and then either keep the leftovers and eat them within a few days, or freeze them and save for days when you don’t have the time or energy to cook.  You’d be surprised at what you can freeze, my freezer usually contains homemade pesto, soups, macaroni cheese, muffins, biscuits and more!

Apparently little ones will get more independent as they get older, but for now it’s about survival!  What are your tips for cooking with a clingy baby or toddler?